"The most critical time in any battle is not when I'm fatigued, it's when I no longer care."
~ Craig D. Lounsbrough

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I am just a dog breeder’s husband
I no longer rule my domain
Even if kindly invited
From opinions I wisely refrain.
It appears that his eyesight is failing
His errors in judgment immense
In fact if I didn’t know better
You’d doubt that he had any sense.
I am just a glorified kennel boy
Of minor Importance I know
It seems that my primary function
Is merely providing the dough.
One finds that amateur’s bungling
No match for professional skill
A handler can hide what an owner admits
As he tries hard his conscience to still.
Now dog breeding’s not inexpensive
As you all are no doubt aware
But the problem’s not so much the money
As the bustle, the wear and tear.
The din and utter confusion
Of everyone talking at once
Leaves one weary, hoarse and irascible
And the next day a bleary-eyed dunce.
Having studied the layback of shoulder
And becoming an expert on feet
I still have not learned to give worm pills
Or how much a puppy should eat.
Sometimes late in the evening
I am asked if I do not agree
That Who-z-ma-call-its Bridget
Is somewhat down at the knee.
My spouse will spend hours trimming
A ‘Bred By Exhibitor Bitch‘
But when it comes to scratching my back
Her thoughts are to let the thing itch.
But before I can answer the question
I find that my answer’s ignored
For some inexplicable reason
My questioner’s suddenly bored.
Some summer I hope that my wife’ll
Take me wandering in some foreign vale
Instead of inspecting the stifle
Of some special stud at Hinsdale.
I am only a dog breeder’s husband
Not that I mean to complain
But I find certain aspects amazing
When I aspire my role to explain.
Oft in a crowded motel room
After the show is o’er
Someone will question the judge’s decision
While they reach for another drink more.
I know at least where I’m going
I’m rapidly going to seed
But I’ve learned about ‘Winner’s Bitches‘
I’ve married the ‘˜Best of the Breed.’

- Unknown